You've Got a Reason to Live
by babylanii
Summary: L/L, always. Partings & slightly beyond. Just my take on what should have happened. :


You've Got a Reason to Live, A One shot

Time: Partings

Disclaimer: Well, duh.

Song lyrics are from I Don't Wanna Be in Love by Good Charlotte

Also it may seem like I'm painting Christopher as a good guy, just note that I hate him just as much as you do. ;)

And, I'm going to take some dialogue from the show, only because it's completely relevant to what I'm writing. Just know that, I don't often do that.

And a final note, I used to go by a different pen name, and this is the first story I've posted in probably over a year and a half. Hope it isn't too unbearable!

* * *

_"She's going out to forget they were together,_

_all that time he was taking her for granted._

_She wants to see if there's more_

_than he gave, she's looking for."_

In the time that Lorelai and Luke had spent together, there relationship wasn't rocky, volatile, or unsure. They had spent so long dancing around each other that they just knew it was right. They were right together. It was fate. It was meant to be. Yet, there they stood. In the middle of the dark, empty Stars Hollow street. Arguing.

"You're gonna have to figure out how April fits into our lives, not the other way around!" Lorelai shouted.

"I'm trying." Luke responded.

"Well, try married!"

"Just… wait!"

"No, Luke! I'm not waiting. It's now or never."

Luke gritted his teeth, and rung his hands, "I don't like ultimatums." He said matter-of-factly.

"I don't like Mondays, but unfortunately they come around eventually!" She witted back.

"I..I can't just jump like this." He stumbled over his words.

"Well," Lorelai wiped a single tear from her eye, "I'm sorry to hear that." For a long moment they stared into each others eyes, seeming to search for the answers that in reality, were sitting right there in front of them. "And I have to go." She stated. Then, Lorelai turned on her heel, hugged her sweater closer to her, and walked away from Luke. She had had enough, rightfully so. So when she finally ambled all the way to her car, she got in, started the engine and drove to the place that would upset Luke the most.

When Christopher opened the door, Lorelai was already in tears. "Hey," He said, searching for her eyes that were fixed on the floor.

"Hey, I uh…" She finally looked up. Her eyes were red and swollen, it looked to be a miracle that she'd made it all the way to Chris' house without crashing. "I'm having a really bad night and um, I just… I don't want to be alone. Is this okay?"

"Yeah, uh, come on in." He said, opening the door so Lorelai could slip past him. "Do you want something to drink?" Chris asked.

Lorelai weighed her options. In her heart she knew the past she shared with the man standing in front of her, she knew what always seemed to happen when they had a few drinks. So, she said, "Just water, if you don't mind."

"Sure, sure. I'll be right back." When he came back a few moments later, they sat silently for a few minutes. Lorelai took a sip of her water, put it on the table in front of her, and mostly looked down at the ground. "So, Lor… do you want to talk about it? Or tell me what happened? I don't really know what to do, here."

"I just don't want to be alone, Christopher. I didn't know where else to go. Logan's leaving for London tomorrow so I couldn't bother Rory, and I've been crashing with Sookie this week, so I couldn't go back there. I just.. I didn't know what else to do. I shouldn't be here, I'm sorry." She ran her long, shaky fingers through her tousled hair. "I think I left Luke, Chris."

"You think?"

"Well, I walked away in the middle of a pretty monumental conversation." Christopher scooted closer to Lorelai on his couch, and put his arm around her. "I wanted this to work out, Chris. And you're probably one of the last people on earth I thought I'd be telling this, but I wanted more than anything in the world to marry Luke." Christopher kissed the top of Lorelai's head, in a friendly, comforting manner. "I still want to marry him, I just… I don't think it's going to work out that way."

"Lorelai, I've known you for most of my life, and when you want something to work out, it generally does." He laughed a little.

Lorelai looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, "The problem isn't me this time, though. And I can't fix it…" With that, she lost it. The tiny threads that held together Lorelai Gilmore had snapped, and out poured months worth of pent up emotions.

_"He calls her up, he's trippin' on the phone now._

_He doesn't want her out there and alone now._

_He knows she's moving it._

_Knows she's using it._

_Now he's losing it, she don't care."_

The moment Lorelai turned on her heel, and walked away Luke went into panic mode. He watched her walk all the way back to her jeep before finally turning back to the full diner. He knew the entire town had just witnessed what happened, and couldn't bare to go back inside. Instead, he called Caesar, told him to close up shop and immediately ran to his truck and began to drive. He went to the first place he thought Lorelai would go.

"Luke…um, hi!" A slightly intoxicated Rory in a bright blonde wig, greeted.

"Um, Rory, is your mom here by any chance? I didn't mean to interrupt…" Luke said, his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

"Nah, she's not here… is everything okay?" Rory slurred.

"Yeah, don't worry. Everything's going to be fine." Luke forced a smile. "If your mom comes by here, could you give me a call?"

"Absolutely, Luke. Are you sure you're okay? You don't look so great…"

"I'm uh, I'm fine. Really. Thanks Rory, go have fun." He laughed, and turned back to the elevator. When he stepped back into the comfort of his truck he pulled out his phone and pressed speed dial number one.

_"Because like, I'm number one!"_ Lorelai had once said.

It rang several times, and went to voicemail. "Lorelai, I need you to call me." He plead with her voicemail. "I need to fix this. Us. Me. I'm sorry, I'm a jerk. And, I can't do this by myself. I need your help. And… I don't want to talk to your answering machine." He hung up and swore to himself, "Damn it."

By the time Luke had gotten to Rory's and back in his truck, Lorelai had already fallen fast asleep on Christopher's couch. Her purse lay on the table, and Christopher sat on the recliner chair next to the couch.

When Chris heard the cell phone ring, he reached inside the bag to silence it, but before he could he heard Lorelai whisper something in her sleep. "Luke? I love you, Luke." And that's when he knew. Lorelai didn't play around with love, she didn't play around with the word 'love' either. She had never once, in the twenty plus years they'd known each other, after they'd had a child together, been engaged, all of that, she had never once said, "Christopher, I love you." because she didn't. It was in that moment, that Christopher knew he had to do the right thing. He let the phone ring, in hopes that it would wake her up, and by the time it finished ringing and she did wake up, he pretended to be asleep.

Lorelai said up and rubbed her eyes for a moment, taking in her surroundings as if she didn't believe the night was real. She dug in her bag for her cell phone, pulled it out and listened to the voicemail.

She shook her head, closed her phone and whispered, "Chris, I have to go." Christopher took a second, as to convince Lorelai that he too was asleep.

Finally he said, "Are you sure? You can stay if you want, I have a spare bedroom."

"Um, Luke called and… I just either need to fix it or tie up the loose ends, you know? I appreciate the offer and um," She paused. "Thank you for being a friend, Chris. Thank you for not taking advantage of my emotional state. I didn't know what I expected to happen, when I came here. But, I'm really glad that it happened as it did."

"I know how much you care about him, Lorelai. I wouldn't screw that up."

"I love him, Christopher."

"That's really hard for me to hear." He admitted.

"I know, but… I needed to tell you."

"I understand." And that being said, Lorelai smiled at Christopher, gathered her things and let herself out.

_"You've got a reason to live._

_Say I don't wanna be in love, I don't wanna be in love._

_Feeling good now, don't be afraid to get down._

_Say, I don't wanna be in love. I don't wanna be in love."_

_"We break up, it's something that we do now._

_Everyone has got to do it sometime._

_It's okay. Let it go._

_Get out there, and find someone."_

By the time Lorelai pulled onto her street it was well into the night. All of Stars Hollow was surely asleep, and she wanted to do the same. She'd decided on her drive that she'd talk to Luke again in the morning. They both obviously needed time to sort through what was important, and she wanted to give him the respect, she'd hoped to receive, but when she pulled her car up to her house she saw that familiar green truck parked in her drive.

"Luke," She said, getting out of the car and walking up to her front door. Luke sat on the stairs leaning one-sided against the railing.

"You went too fast." He said.

"That's me, hun. I'm fast. I needed you to keep up, and you didn't."

"I've had a chance to catch up, now, I think. I want to talk. I want to fix this." He stood up, blocking the front door. In case she should want to leave the conversation. When she didn't reply, he continued, "I didn't think it was real, Lorelai. You were standing there in the street saying all of these things and I didn't think it was real. I didn't want to believe it. When I watched you walk away, I wanted to come after you but I couldn't move because watching you leave made it real. Without you, nothing is real and I don't want to wait any more.

You're right, I need to figure out how April fits into our life. Not the other way around." Still, she said nothing. "I drove all the way to New Haven, I thought you went to Rory's but she said you weren't there, so I drove to Hartford and your car wasn't there, so I just came back here. I've been waiting and it's been the hardest few hours of my life. Honestly. And I'm not saying I know how you feel, but I want you to know that I know how unfair it was for me to make you wait while I sort through things with April. I'm ready. Whenever you are. You say the word, and we'll hop on a plane to Vegas. Or Maryland, or wherever. Or if you want to plan something, start planning. Whatever you want Lorelai, it's yours. I'm yours."

Lorelai considered all that he said for a moment, and then took a few steps forward. "What are you doing?" Luke asked.

She smiled, remembering their first kiss on the steps of the Dragonfly, he'd asked that same question. And so she replied, "Would you just stand still?" And she kissed him.

She kissed him long and hard.

_"Now you know what do to,_

_So come up, get up, girl."_

FIN.

R&R? :)


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